{despairing} i can keep my anxiety under wraps, usually. right now? not usual. my mind hop-skips-jumps from this to that: normal. when the hop-skips-jumps turn to leaps-bounds &, finally, denigrating assessments of itself/me, i begin to lose control. deep breathing. pet the cat. everything will be fine--not because it's the optimal outcome, but because there is no other way for it to be, now. choices can't be unmade; those are immaterial. today is what i choose, nevermind how narrow that confine is. it is still mine to make. |
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