i have been trying trying trying to not restrict what i'm writing to counted syllables. i'll admit: it's harder than i thought it might be.

i don't know what my sick fascination with facebook is. i write people off about as quickly as our proximity drops outside of two hours driving distance. so what is with me looking up old friends? i want to know where they are, and whether they have made a jillion dollars yet. i mostly know where they are, but i can say they haven't got a jillion.

worse yet: i keep comparing their post-grad education. i fucking hate them for knowing what they want to do, fucking hate myself for not knowing. why do i have to put up roadblocks for everything that i might be mildly interested in? it as if i am cursed with mirror-pollyannaism.