i discovered, upon bouncing on the bed beside husband-who-is-trying-to-read, that he does not welcome distraction when trying to read. this is a discovery because: everyfuckingday he sidles over to the couch where i am nose-deep in a book, then, metaphorically speaking, pokes me. i invariably peer over my obsession to glare until he retreats to some other uninhabited region of the house.

hypocrisy is so refreshing.

today has been the day for experiments and discoveries.

one. at work, a coworker attempted to forego all sustenance (save those damn six almonds he ate before work), a social experiment in tolerance and fortitude, if you will. at lunch, he bee-lined for the chinese buffet and gorged himself on fried, salted deliciousness.

two. poor planning and time management on the part of my managers gave me the opportunity to show myself an industrious american. had i refrained, they would have been unable to meet their eom inventory deadlines. naturally, the only acknowledgement of this came from the least tenured (i.e. most human) of my managers. the store manager gave encouragement, as if i were a puppy learning to rollover on command.

i helped mostly cuz i was bored and tired of sitting. other part in hope that when the am comes next week, she, having heard good things about me, leaves me the fuck alone.

i have unwittingly put myself in calorie deprivation, which became abundantly apparent when i tore through my calorie-dense new mexican meal with such agression and precision that both my husband and brother were awed.

i think i may unconsciously have challenged myself to push the envelope with run-on sentences. consciously, i am not a fan.